The author reflects on a high school experience where she stood up for herself, then later forgot her strength. Recently, she realized she was placing herself at the mercy of various struggles. Remembering God’s mercy and love, she finds confidence and freedom, embracing her identity as a daughter of God. The passage from Mark exemplifies the power of seeking mercy from Jesus. … More Have Mercy on Me
For three and a half months I felt like a balloon had swelled in my belly. Sometimes, sharp jolts would move through my colon and fold me over, my breath catching in my throat and my eyes widening in pain. It was the dead of summer in California’s Central Valley where temps often reach well … More The Fear of the Lord is the Beginning of Freedom
The concept of a “calling” has raised doubts for many, including those with religious backgrounds. Feeling paralyzed by the pressure to discern God’s will, they question its association with personal aspirations. Perhaps, they ponder, one’s “calling” and God’s will could simply involve becoming Christ-like. Embracing this idea may lead to a more fulfilling approach to faith and vocation. … More “I Found My Calling!” — Or Maybe Not
When I was a little girl and we lived in the Pacific Northwest, my birthday always landed during the state fair. The fairgrounds, which were huge and magical and full of classic autumn nostalgia as the all-day crisp air and orange-tinted sunshine gently whipped the smell of farm animals and candy apples and the music … More What I Know for Certain
The following post is the final part of a series describing my story of deconstructing my Christian faith and reconstructing it within orthodoxy rather than choosing to deconvert. Make sure to read up on Part 1 and Part 2 before moving on! Where Else Would I Go? There’s a song by John Mark Pantana that goes like this: … More Deconstruction: your faith has saved you, Part 3
The following post is part of a series describing my story of deconstructing my Christian faith and reconstructing it within orthodoxy rather than choosing to deconvert. Make sure to read up on Part 1 before moving on! In January 2019, as I was sitting in the quiet and writing in my journal, an image came … More Deconstruction: self-exposure, Part 2
The following post is part of a series describing my story of deconstructing my Christian faith and reconstructing it within orthodoxy rather than choosing to deconvert. What is “Deconstruction”? Deconstruction is a hot term floating around Christian circles right now and feels amplified because social media, big-name pastors, Christian leaders, and docuseries like “Shiny Happy … More Deconstruction: the struggle with God, Part 1
I know the love of God the most when it rains. As a little girl in the Pacific Northwest, before I knew about bad things beyond a scraped knee, it rained. It was a consistent rhythm, and I was a sponge for it as the nostalgic walls of childhood innocence were building up deep in … More The Love of God Lives in the Dry Places, too
There’s a piece of scratch paper I have on my fridge with a quote in pencil written in my friend’s handwriting. She wrote this down several years ago in a spur of the moment when she was at my house, and she left it for me. It says this from Oswald Chambers: My goal is … More Joy is Secure
My deepest longing and most tender pain point is the desire to be seen. I mean, seen. I want the right people to notice when I’m wearing a mask and that I’m leaking out, even when I don’t realize it myself. I know this longing very well, and yet I still hide myself away behind … More To See & Be Seen